help

I've had this thought that keeps nagging at me and I'm not sure what to do. I have this person in my life that is having a hard time, but at the same time I feel like they've brought a lot of it upon themselves. I feel like someone needs to reach out to them and help them, but I don't want to enable their current behavior, but I think if I don't then they will only get worse.
I don't really know how to say what I'm hoping for. I guess I just want them to feel like they are accepted, and that they have someone to talk to, but not whine too! well I will add to this later, I've got to shower and such now!
I think I need to put some more thought into this one.